Beautifully Hurt (Beautifully Broken) Read online

  Copyright © 2017 by M.A. Heard.

  Previously published as Redemption

  Rebranded 2021 as Beautifully Hurt

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written consent of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotation embodied in critical reviews and various other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

  The resemblance to actual persons, things, living or dead, locales, or events is entirely coincidental.

  Original Title Published 2017: Redemption.

  Cover Designer: Cormar Covers

  TABLE OF CONTENTS

  Dedication

  Songlist

  Synopsis

  BEAUTIFULLY HURT

  Family Tree

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Epilogue

  Published Books

  Connect with me

  Acknowledgments

  Dedication

  Sheldon.

  May you never stop dreaming.

  May you look up at the stars and realize you’re part of a bigger plan than the one you have for yourself.

  May you know kindness, inner peace, love, and faith for all of your life.

  I love you.

  Mom.

  Songlist

  Click here - Spotify

  The Gambler – Kenny Rogers

  Go Your Own Way – Lissie

  Feels Like Home – Edwina Hayes

  Say Anything – Tristan Prettyman

  Dream – Priscilla Ahn

  Violin – Amos Lee

  Be Still – The Fray

  We All Need Saving – Jon McLaughlin

  Never Alone – Jim Brickman, Lady A

  You’ve Got What I Need – Joshua Radin

  Be My Only – Fm Radio

  They Bring Me To You – Joshua Radin

  Synopsis

  Eli Jackson. Rugged and broody, he’s had my attention since high school.

  I’ve hardly spoken to him, too nervous to get a word out whenever he’s near.

  Until one night when he helps me out of a situation.

  I manage to worm my way into his life, and slowly all my dreams start to come true.

  A horrific attack shatters my life. I wasn’t supposed to survive, and now I depend on Eli for my survival because I’m the only witness who can identify the killers.

  Never in a million years did I think the man of my dreams would be the one to glue my pieces back together.

  But with the lingering threat, can Eli protect me when my nightmares return to silence me?

  BEAUTIFULLY HURT

  Suspense Romance / Dark Romance

  COMPLETE STANDALONE.

  Previously published as ‘REDEMPTION.’

  WARNING:

  This book contains subject matter that may be sensitive for some readers. There is dark and triggering content between these pages related to violence.

  18+ only.

  Please read responsibly.

  Family Tree

  Eli Jackson

  ↓

  24 years old

  Father: Alex Jackson

  Mother: Nina Jackson

  Brother: Ethan Jackson

  Bestfriend: Jason Sherwood

  Quinn Drake

  ↓

  21 years old

  Father: Josh Drake

  Mother: Passed away

  Bestfriend: Katie Conley

  Cousin: Finlay Drake

  Uncle: David Drake

  Prologue

  ELI

  The Past… 7 years old.

  “I’m afraid.” My hands tremble under the heavy weight of the gun. This is the first time Dad’s letting me hold one.

  Dad lies down next to me and places his hand beneath mine. Feeling his fingers wrap around mine makes me feel a little braver.

  “It’s good to be afraid,” Dad murmurs, his voice deep and soothing.

  I glance up at him, my eyes wide. “But you’re not afraid of anything.” My dad’s the strongest person I know. I want to be just like him when I grow up.

  “Everyone has at least one thing they’re afraid of, Eli.”

  I wet my lips and taste the layer of sand sticking to them from lying on the ground. We’re far enough from the house, in a small clearing between the trees. Watching Dad hit one target after the other is fun, but now it’s my turn, and I don’t feel half as brave as I’d like to be in front of Dad.

  Ethan didn’t come with us today. Mom gave Dad the same look she gives me when I’ve been naughty and told him Ethan’s too young.

  “What’s the one thing you’re afraid of, Dad?”

  Dad’s eyes leave the gun and find mine. I have the same light blue eyes and dark brown hair as him.

  “I’m afraid of not being there when you, Ethan, or your mom might need me.”

  I frown, thinking about what he just said.

  “It’s my responsibility to keep you all safe,” he adds. “I’m afraid the time will come when I can’t do that anymore.”

  “I’ll be there, Dad. I’ll keep you all safe.”

  A smile pulls at the corner of his mouth, and I know I said the right thing.

  “What are you afraid of?” Dad asks.

  I tighten my grip on the gun again, and then I admit, “I’m afraid of not making you proud.” He frowns, so I quickly explain. “I want to be just like you when I grow up. What if I’m not as strong as you? What if I can’t shoot as well as you? I don’t want to disappoint you.”

  Dad ruffles my hair. “There’s nothing you could do to disappoint me, little man. You want to know a secret?”

  I nod quickly, eager to hear what it is.

  “It’s good to be afraid, Eli. It means you care. You might not always do the right thing, and you might not always be good at what you do, but the secret is to keep trying. You just need to keep trying and never stop caring.”

  “Like caring about you, Mom, and Ethan?”

  “Not just us, Eli. One day you might meet someone weaker than you. That person might have no one who cares about them, and it will be up to you to help them.”

  “One day, I’ll be as strong as you if I keep trying, right?”

  “Yes, little man. One day you’ll be stronger, and you will still be afraid of something. Never back away from your fears, son. Facing a fear head-on is the only way to overcome it.”

  I look ahead of me again, and my eyes jump from the big gun to the target. My stomach nervously twists and turns as I start to squeeze the trigger. The bang is loud, and the gun jumps in my hand, but Dad catches the weapon before I drop it. I dart up from the ground and run like the wind to the target, excited to see if I hit it.

  When I don’t see a hole, disappointment stabs at my heart. I look around for the bullet, but there’s no sign of it.

  Dang.

/>   With my shoulders slumping, I turn around and drag my feet back to where Dad’s still lying down.

  “Come on,” he says, nodding to the ground beside him. “Practice makes perfect.”

  Nodding, I lie back down and take the gun from him.

  I have to keep trying because a Jackson never gives up.

  I’m going to keep trying until I get it right so I can be ready when I meet that person who might need me. One day I’ll follow in Dad’s footsteps, and I’ll make him proud.

  Chapter 1

  QUINN

  Quinn 21. Eli 24.

  Placing a fresh arrangement of flowers in the display window, my eyes automatically find their way to the hardware store across the road.

  Eli Jackson.

  Sigh.

  I’ve been in love with him since my freshman year. He was a senior and wasn’t aware of my existence. He still isn’t, even though we’ve been working across the road from each other the past three years.

  I was lucky that my best friend Katie arranged a job for me at The Green Leaf, which belongs to her mom.

  Eli’s family bought the hardware store when Joshua retired, and renamed it Jackson’s Hardware. So, I’m able to continue my drooling over the oldest Jackson brother without him knowing.

  The Jackson’s live on the outskirts of Southport. Even though they like to keep to themselves, there’s not a single person in our coastal town who doesn’t know who they are.

  Eli and his younger brother, Ethan, both take after their father. Everyone knows not to look for trouble with them. Their mother’s quiet, but whenever our paths cross, she’s always friendly.

  A smile curves my mouth as Eli steps out of the hardware store. He leans back against the wall and glances up the road.

  Again… sigh.

  His over six-foot, muscled body has featured in many of my fantasies. But his eyes… God, his baby blues render me speechless.

  Eli’s head turns in my direction, and I almost knock a vase from the display shelf as I pretend to make some adjustments to an arrangement of red roses.

  My breathing’s instantly out of control while my cheeks go up in flames. My poor heart’s beating a mile a minute.

  I let out a soft chuckle at how silly I’m being.

  The doorbell jingles, and glancing up, pins and needles rush over my skin while my eyes widen.

  Baby Jesus in a manger.

  “Hey,” Eli says, his voice low and deliciously deep.

  I lift a hand and wave lamely at him, unable to open my mouth.

  He’s here.

  In front of me.

  Holy crap.

  My heart leaps to my throat, effectively disabling my vocal cords. My eyes devour every solid inch of him, and damn if he doesn’t look hot in his worn blue jeans and a black t-shirt.

  Eli glances at the flowers. “Do you have any peonies?”

  With my voice still missing in action, I nod before rushing to the back room where we keep most of our stock. Picking up a bundle of yellow peonies and a bouquet of pink ones, I will my heart to slow down.

  Calm down, Quinn. Be cool.

  The smile strains nervously around my lips as I head back to the front of the store. Eli’s eyes lock on mine, and they’re so freaking intense there’s no way on God’s green earth I’m going to get a word out.

  Like an idiot, I just hold up the selection of peonies, and it draws his gaze to the flowers. “The yellow ones, please,” he murmurs.

  I nod and quickly place the pink flowers in water before wrapping the yellow one’s up in paper. I ring the amount up, and then my eyes widen slightly.

  Crap.

  Freaking talk, Quinn.

  I clear my throat, and keeping my gaze on the flowers, I say, “That’ll be thirty dollars.”

  Eli hands me the cash, and taking hold of his purchase, he tilts his head to catch my eyes. The moment mine lock with his baby blues, my mouth grows dry, and my heart goes from racing to thundering against my ribs.

  “Thanks, Quinn,” he says, the corner of his mouth lifting slightly in a way too hot grin.

  That’s it. I can die happy now.

  “You’re welcome,” I reply, my voice soft but strained.

  You’re so freaking welcome. Please come again.

  Eli’s eyes linger on me for a couple of seconds, enough time to make the world stop spinning, and then he walks out of the store.

  I suck in a desperate breath of air, and placing my hand over my heart, I stare dreamily at his retreating broad back.

  Nina, Eli’s mom, pulls up to the Jackson’s Hardware, and I watch as Eli wraps her in a hug before giving her the flowers. Nina smiles happily at her eldest, and then they talk as they head inside their store.

  God, is there anything more perfect on this planet than Eli Jackson?

  Katie comes in, and when she places my vanilla latte down in front of me, she teases, “Someone saw Eli.”

  “Better,” I say, grinning widely. “Eli came in to buy peonies for Nina.”

  Katie’s eyebrows shoot up. “You actually spoke to him?”

  Pulling a disgruntled face, I pick up my latte. “No, my voice decided to stop working again.”

  Katie comes around the counter and gives me a sideways hug. “Don’t worry, you’ll get another chance.”

  “Which won’t help if I can’t bring myself to talk to him.” I roll my eyes. “He must think I’m a naïve little girl.”

  “I’m sure he doesn’t,” Katie tries to comfort me.

  I take a sip of my latte, then shrug. “I’ll just admire him from a safe distance. Eli’s way too much man for me.”

  A burst of laughter from Katie has me glaring at her.

  “He’s too much man for any woman in this town,” she states.

  I let out a sigh. “If only dreams came true.”

  Katie heads to the back room, then calls out, “We should grab a drink after work. You need to get out more.”

  “I get out plenty.” I walk to the doorway between the front and back so I can see Katie, where she’s taken a seat at her desk. “But a drink sounds good.”

  “It’s a date,” she grins at me. “And maybe I’ll get lucky and catch Jason’s eye.”

  “Yeah, one of us needs to land the man of her dreams,” I say, and then my phone beeps, drawing my attention. Picking up the device from where I left it on the counter, I open a message from my cousin.

  Finlay: I’m bored.

  I let out a chuckle, then call out to Katie, “Finlay texted me. She’d bored.”

  “Tell her to move to Southport already,” Katie replies.

  Quinn: Katie says you should just move here.

  Finlay: I’m definitely thinking about it. With Dad in Saudi Arabia, the house is quiet.

  Quinn: Do it. You can move in with me.

  Finlay: I’ll talk to Dad about selling the house.

  Quinn: Let me know how it goes.

  Finlay: Hugs.

  “She’s going to talk to Uncle David about selling the house,” I tell Katie.

  She comes to sit next to me behind the counter. “I think that’s a great idea. It’s stupid that you’re both living alone. Finlay can move in with you.”

  “That’s what I told her.”

  Our fathers are brothers, and Finlay’s only two years younger than me. It would be great to have her here with me.

  ELI

  Checking the plywood we just received, a smile tugs at the corner of my mouth from how happy Mom was when she saw the flowers.

  It was a spur-of-the-moment decision to get her flowers, and seeing how much she appreciated them made me wish I’d done it more often.

  Happy with the delivery, I sign for it then watch as the driver leaves. I pull the shutter doors closed before walking to the front of the store.

  Mom started working for Joshua, the previous owner, before I was born. When he retired, Dad bought the place, and after I returned from my military service, I took over. I served two years because Dad
said it helped build character, and he was right. I feel like I left a boy and came back a man.

  The store keeps me busy, but I spend all my free time building my own place. The piece of land I got is walking distance from my parents' house.

  Stopping at the store’s entrance, I lean my shoulder against the doorjamb and cross my arms over my chest. My eyes find their way to The Green Leaf across the road, and I let out a soft chuckle.

  Quinn Drake. The shy girl with a smile that stole the sun right from the sky.

  Quinn’s pretty with warm, brown hair and eyes, and it’s only a matter of time before one of the guys in town sweeps her up. Her best friend, Katie, is pretty too. I know Jason, a friend from school, has his eye on her.

  Like everything else in this town, relationships happen at a snail's pace, and it’s always everyone’s business. There’s no such thing as privacy in Southport.

  Glancing over my shoulder, I check the time on the clock above the counter. Another twenty minutes before I’ll close up shop and head over to the bar to have a drink with Jason.

  Turning my gaze back to the road, it’s in time to see Katie and Quinn lock the door to The Green Leaf. Katie spots me and waves, and then she slaps Quinn on her arm, saying something to her. Quinn’s head whips my way, and after giving me a quick wave, she darts down the road before I even have a chance to return the greeting.

  If I weren’t so busy building my house, I’d think about asking Quinn out on a date. But she’s the kind of girl you wine and dine. You don’t just fuck her and walk away.

  No, not Quinn Drake. She’s the girl you take home to your parents.

  Checking the time again, I push away from the doorjamb and walk to the counter.

  Just then, Steward rushes into the store. “Caught you just in time,” he chuckles, sounding relieved. “My drill bit the dust halfway through putting up those shelves Jill’s been nagging me for.”

  I gesture to the aisle where I keep the power tools. “The Craftsman’s seventy-nine, ninety-nine. It will get the job done.”